I'm really excited about this year. It feels like a new beginning. I just had a birthday, which made me so glad to look forward to things. I mean, I get to package up all the things that were less than amazing about last year and never think about them again, right? I'm 28. 28 year olds get to make their own decisions about how they live their lives. I mean, I'm practically an adult. And therefore, I decide that nothing bad will happen this year. At least, that's what I think when I'm feeling powerful. But then I come back to reality and remember that I.AM.NOT.IN.CONTROL. We (as a family) just got some more bad news. Which, to me, is a punch in the face realization that the world keeps moving. Life is still Life.
I'm also a bit sad about the passing of time. Last Christmas was the last time I got to see Meghan healthy and with a full head of hair. I used to write her emails and letters... mostly asking her dumb questions about Canada. About whether or not every kid learns how to curl in school... which, apparently, they do. I've been wanting to write her letters again or see her post something on FB... something like... "hearts n junk" on Adam's page.
I know I'll see her again. But there's still achiness and hurtyness (it's a word; stop judging me) when I think about her and miss her. I don't think that will go away. But as I said earlier, Life is still Life. It keeps moving whether you want it to or not. We pick up the pieces, and carry on as best we can.
Sometimes, we'll get to smile.
